Note to OCD women.

Okay, pissed off just enough to write a little side note for today. This mom is KILLING me. I helped set the table for dinner tonight, and she told me to clean it afterwards. We all started to, then the dad and son left and I did it by myself. But i left some food on the table because I didn't know where to put it. She comes into the living room just now like, DAVEEEED, come here! So I come and she goes into how there is still stuff on the table and onto a rant about how I need to help out more, and how I never do the dishes, clean, etc... ARE YOU SERIOUS???? So I said "ummm what? most of the time it is ME who did the dishes, and I clean the table every night after dinner! (and take out the trash)" Man I was pissed but held it in, I mean she is completely mental. In a normal day I do the dishes, and at least help prepare the food and keep the kitchen clean by wiping down everything.. always asking if I can help her with something. Never a thank you. In fact she expects it, and I want to remind her its not in my contract. I paid thousands to be here to teach, not to be a freakin maid. And if she keeps it up much longer I'm gunna make that verrrry clear.

Gordes

The last few days have been a good change of pace for me. Wednesday I got a call from the agent here in France telling me an American girl was coming into Avignon and wanted to meet up. So we did, took her around and ended up sitting by the river most of the day. It was pretty relaxing. She's from Wisconsin and is living with a family in Nîmes nearby, so we had a good time making fun of each other's accent.

Thursday I chilled here at the house, taught Matt and his friend. My computer shocks me every time I use it now and I had it placed on a metal table outside during the English lesson, so we kept swapping dares to touch it the longest. It was quite painful. After the mom made me clean something so him and his friend were making fun of me. A spray and rag fight ensued and somehow ended up with a little karate or kickboxing of some sort haha. Even the mother joined in and she can throw a mean punch, not to mention swift kick in the rear. Later though I received some bad news that my grandfather is doing really bad and probably won't make it much longer :/

Today I got up early and went to the bakery with the parents here and got to see how everything works. Video below, pictures on fb. Found out another weird custom, and that is if you can't shake hands.. you shake the wrist. It took me a few minutes to figure out what the heck he was trying to do, but he had to keep his hands clean apparently. So, I took a walk around the town (Gordes) and it was pretty stunning. My camera died so I'll have to go back. Its an old roman town with lots of houses built into the cliff side and underground on top of a huge mountain. I managed just one photo. Also when i was walking around I noticed the rocks I was stepping on were crumbling, then to realize I was actually ending the life of a lot of snails.... big ones. I kinda felt bad. So the next one I came across I relocated to a plant it could devour haha as if that made up for the dead ones.

So yea, now I'm home, kinda zombie-like and going to go teach some english. Ciao!

C'est bizarre, non?

Sooo been kinda lax on the posts recently. Just not a whole lot going on in the week. I can't really start traveling until May :) but here we go. Today was pretty chill I must say. Got up and drank a lot of coffee, went for a run, had some lunch yada yada. When Valerie came home she asked me if I wanted to come to dinner with her and Bob up in the mountains with their friends. Sounded good to me. The drive up was stunning and I wish I had brought my camera. When we get to the house I’m warmly greeted by everyone and of course the fact that I am American catches their attention. One lady immediately started speaking English because she studied it at Oxford for three years. So we put on some reggae and just chill music in general and headed outside. The backyard dropped off and overlooked a small village and the mountains. Pretty beautiful. Everyone was extremely funny around the dinner table. Typical dirty French humor abounded. I was the victim of some jokes but my French didn’t stop me from responding in kind which they thought was amazing haha. The older man with the beard told me he has a boat down in Marseille and I’m welcome to come down anytime I want. He then told me we have to sleep together lol, picking on me of course. So I just said back… I’m gunna warn you I like to cuddle.. This kind of went back and forth throughout the night with various topics. Unfortunately the topic of politics came up later and I tried my best to explain America’s economics in French, bluhhh. Oh, it was kind of ironic at one point… they asked me which countries I have traveled to and I started out by saying Jamaica and that they smoke a lot of a certain plant there, and just as I say this they’re like, us too! And start passing some around. Won’t lie.. kindddda caught me off guard just a little bit. It then made sense when she had asked if I wanted something from her garden…. I kindly refused. The night then felt a little weird because actually just before that a slew of their neighbors had come running through the house and outside dressed in drag or as Disney characters.
The food was of course delicious, when do I stay it is not? I had a drink only made in Marseille, which tasted pretty amazing, wish I could remember the name. Very strong though, a very high proof, but it still went down soo smooth. So yea, that was today. Valerie told me we should go shopping together tomorrow in Avignon so I’m going to try and find some ultra-european clothes, maybe even those tiny bathing suits for Marseille next weekend… and I will most definitely take pictures of that!

Oh, and I’ll edit into the post the pictures of this night when I get them from Robert (the friend of the family) which should be soon, so you can put faces to everthing!

The Milgram Experiment

So I'm just writing this in case my computer finally goes to computer heaven. Or maybe computer hell because I'm of the opinion it is trying to kill me. Every time I plug it in the whole thing starts to electrically charge... to the point where it hurts to type because my fingers tingle. If i touch a metal part (like 90% of the casing) i can't distinctly feel the electricity. Or if I touch any buttons or screws it feels like that game where you hold the sticks and then it goes lalalalduhnahlalala----zzzzzzappppp! I tried fixing the power plug with metal pliers today which probably wasn't the best of ideas. So pretty much I might have to be looking into a replacement sometime soon before I get fried for good.

Kiss, Kiss, Quoi???

Another day in the books. I woke up this morning to my already crappy computer even crappier. The crappiest of crappies. Because, well when I got back from the disco last nite it was around 3am (there is no last call in France btw), I whipped out the ole mac for a little something to put me to sleep, and that was the Antiques Roadshow haha. Somewhere between a really old valuable object... and this other really really old more valuable-er-est object I dozed off, to awaken and find my computer had fallen to the floor... the floor of doom. The little charger plug I found had been bent like crazy and wouldn't fit back into the computer. So great... and let me first explain to you how awesome this laptop I have is. Prepare.. to be jealous. If I don't have the screen at just the right angle it cuts to black until I shut it, thus putting the computer to sleep. If its not plugged in period the battery lasts all of 3 minutes if I'm lucky. Every now and then the speakers short out into a loud static sound (like you hear between stations on the radio) that won't stop and you have to yell over. (Also on that note, when I was real young I used to think that that static sound on the radio came from a dog chewing on a diaper on the other side of the radio... yeaa...). Oh, and when I'm online, if I want to go to a new website I have to force quit the program :) Amazing. But yea... so luckily I straightened it out enough to use.. or else I'd be screwed.

So I went on another way too long run today and when I came back the mom asked me with the look of (Quoi???) as to why I was shirtless. Because I was running I said. She then told me it is "interdit" or "forbidden" to do that in France. I find this quite odd because all I see around here are billboards with totally nude women. Thats sexism haha. I can't even have my shirt off? I'll just be sneaky because I refuse to hardcore farmer's tan it.. and honestly.. I run through the countryside with nothing but dogs chasing me. Maybe they know the rule too and THATs why they are chasing me... barking "C'est interdit !!!!" in barktalk.

And the title for today's little entry is referring to the expression that is probably on my face when I see two guys doing the kiss cheek thing as a hello. Apparently that is only a southern thing here.

Also, I put up some pictures on Facebook. Check it out. There aren't many yet cuz I've been taking mostly video.

I woood laaack to buy a ammburgaarrr...

Not too much to talk about today. This week has been kinda chill. (P.s the French can't say Hamburger enough. The line from the Pink Panther. I'll post a vid soon with that.) So anyway, I'm becoming domesticated haha. Today I did the dishes, prepared the food for dinner, did everyone's laundry and cleaned the terrace. I'm going to buy my maid's uniform tomorrow. Nahh I really don't mind that much, I just think I could pull the outfit off, what do ya think? Really the only other thing I did was a 4 mile run this morning through the countryside, which I'm trying to do everyday now. Exercise is so much easier to do with this view. I'll try and get some pictures up soon. Oh, and tomorrow I'm going to get a taste of my first European Disco haha. This should be interesting. But in the meantime enjoy meeting the guy I'm here for.. Matt!

Nicities

You reach a point eventually when living with someone new where you start to notice little quirks about them. I think I'm getting to that point. When sitting around in the living room I'd hear random sounds like muffled popping and a sound like a fish thrashing to and fro trying to get some of the food that I'm dangling just above the water. It finally dawned on me its a family trait where (I think) they're biting their fingernails and doing some funky tongue action. Gets kind of annoying but I love em anyway. I've also noticed the mom is a wee bit OCD about her house being clean. I washed the dishes today while she was gone, but when she got back she called me inside to show me the dirty counter top, without a thank you for the dishes. Not to mention it was her son who left it like that, and honestly I didn't even know that was considered dirty, but whatever.

Bub's (the dad) mom came by today, got to do the cheek thing again, never gets old. She was extremely sweet and actually spoke some English. We started to make fun of how everyone in the south speaks (very fast and say every-freaking-syllable.. not how they teach in the classroom for sure).

Later... oohhh later.. the food :) once again so good. Baguette, then chinese, some stuffed pastries, seasoned fish with some thick ass bacon and come canna patta for dessert. The fish... was probably some of the best I've had so I asked what it was... anndd you just gotta see a picture of it haha -->--v




Not too much else. Glad to hear my boy Glenn is coming to visit in a few weeks! Yea you Glenn, I know you're reading this. He's one of those headless figures under "Followers" to the left of this post. Everyone say "Hi Glenn!"